10 Simple Techniques on How to Change your Habits (especially if you have struggled in the past)
Everyone has habits they wish they didn’t, and everyone has difficulty changing them. Habits are hard-wired, neurological patterns of behaviour that need to be broken by intentional, conscious practice. They may seem difficult to change but are easier when you know the psychology behind them; after all, there are habits you no longer have that you followed in your earlier life. We are not stuck, and we can change by having the incentive and drive to make a start.
It is fortunate for us that the process of habit change is actually quite simple. When we feel comfortable with our life and habits, we don’t want to change. Living in the perceived safety of our ‘comfort zone’ is one of the strongest habits of all. However, we all know how events can completely shake us out of our comfort and force us into change, and we quickly adapt. For some people, moving away from a habit that is causing them discomfort is the only way that they will make a change. For others, the glimmer of a brighter future helps them to move forward to make changes in their life.
Changing negative habits improves your life. It gives you a sense of power and control and teaches you that you can overcome procrastination.
The secret is always to focus on one unwanted habit at a time and replace it with a new and better habit. The temptation to change many unwanted habits will overwhelm you, but you can definitely change them one-by-one.
To change your habits, follow these simple techniques:
Visualise your Future. Choos one small habit to change and one better and healthier habit to replace it with. What makes you excited to change this unwanted habit? Imagine how things will improve in your future if you change this habit now. What will life be like in one month’s time without this unwanted habit? 6 months’ time? Or one year’s time? How will your life be different with your new and better habit?
One Step at a Time. Work on one small step at a time to achieve it. If you aim too high, the change will likely be too difficult. If you aim too low, you will likely be uninspired to make the change. One of the easiest ways to create a small step is to reduce the time frame to five minutes only, or even just 2 minutes, and slowly increase the time each day or each week. I will exercise for just five minutes this week. Another way is to use distance. I will write a quarter of a page or 120 words. Use realistic numbers that are achievable. Any limit you can think of will build your willpower, and any success you have will increase your limits.
Hold yourself to a Promise. This means involving a friend, your family or a group who are trying to make similar changes. Partner up for more accountability. Strength comes from numbers, as does the motivation to not let others in your team down.
Have a Simple Physical Trigger. Place your running shoes by the door, place a ‘post-it’ note with a reminder on your bathroom mirror, set a timer on your smartphone or watch. Have your pen and notebook open and ready on your desk to write, hang your gym gear in a bag on your front door etc.
Create the Right Environment. Shape your environment to meet the needs of forming your new habit. Get rid of any distractions or temptations. If your habit is to study for five minutes, be in a space where there is no tv, radio or smartphone there vying for your attention. Seek a public environment such as a library to aid your concentration, away from all your toys and gadgets and the internet. Designate a specific space for each activity. As distractible people, we tend to pull double-duty in spaces and multi-tasking interferes with our performance, working on the dining table or on the sofa, or watching tv in the bedroom! This obviously detracts from our concentration and what we can achieve. If your unwanted habit is a certain kind of food, do not let it enter your environment in the first place or replace it for a healthier alternative. If you really can’t live without chocolate, learn to eat 90% cocoa chocolate and you’ll eat much smaller amounts.
Enjoy and Celebrate the Process. Your old unwanted habit needs to be replaced with a more fun way to achieve the same feeling that it provided. So, you used to love sitting on the sofa for hours on end because it made you feel relaxed, now you can achieve the same relaxation in 5 minutes by stretching your body to your favourite music. So, you used to love watching a string of funny YouTube cat videos as time slipped away, now you can love purposefully learning to speak a language, such as Spanish by focusing only on Spanish language YouTube videos instead.
Know The Intention Behind your Unwanted Habit. What was the positive intention behind you unwanted habit? It was likely comfort, and as you look deeply, you will reveal that it was about avoiding the experience of certain uncomfortable feelings. Ask yourself, ‘What feeling am I avoiding by indulging in this habit?’, ‘How can I get this very same feeling in a positive way with a better habit?’
Utilise Willpower. We usually have enough Willpower to get us through the day. Some days you will need to really on sheer discipline and Willpower to challenge your unwanted habit, but you must! Never let a day go by when you allow that unwanted habit to win! Think of those athletes who get up extremely early in the dark and cold, every single day of the year to train. Then they go to work or study, and then they do more training after work. Nobody likes to start, but once you have started, you are likely to continue if you see the positives of what you are doing.
Interrupt the Unwanted Habit. Have an instant interrupt of your unwanted habit as a last resort. Use a simple word such as ‘STOP’ to refocus your attention. It has to be something quick and immediate that you can perform as soon as you find yourself thinking about or indulging in your unwanted habit. Some people wear a rubber band on their wrist and give it a short, sharp snap to remind them. Others will reward themselves with simple praise in the form of an affirmation, such as ‘Well done!’ or ‘Each better choice makes me stronger.’
You have Control through Choice. Remember that every habit can be changed with commitment. All unwanted habits are in existence to give you a feeling (typically comfort and safety), but they can all be replaced with better habits that can achieve that exact same feeling. The secret is to be intentional, conscious and deliberate with your choices and make sure that the positives of the new habit outweigh those of the unwanted habit, and that the pain of the old habit motivates you toward the new!
All the best with your habit changes as we move toward a new and better year!
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