Our Stressed-Out Children! 10 Things You Must Teach Your Kids for Their Mental Health and Wellbeing

Children are more overwhelmed and anxious in life than ever before.  Just like adults, they are subject to a constant barrage of social media and advertising on every device they manage to get their hands on.

“tiktok” and “Instagram” are made to be addictive and attention-grabbing through a relentless feed of mind-numbingly short, entertaining distractions that roll over and over in our feeds.

More children have been exposed to adult life than ever before in history!

To compensate for this exposure, education is under pressure to deliver what we once considered mature content, to a desensitised, younger age group simply to educate them in their new world.

The violent, adult games they play are designed to hook them in and keep them playing.  If many adults can’t control their addictive gaming, how can we expect our much-younger children too?

Your children are growing up too quickly!

At a touch of a button, they are receiving more information than they could possibly accumulate from reading a book or two alone… and we know how trustworthy internet information and news can be!

Digital devices have become the “Go-to” pacifiers for parents to give their children for a few moment’s peace, but this comes at the cost of their mental health.

Here are a few mind-blowing statistics regarding children’s exposure to adult material:

(taken from guardchild.com/statistics on U.S. digital Safeguarding and Child Protection including The National Crime Prevention Center and the Youth Internet Safety Survey)

At least 70% of children from age 8 have encountered pornography while on the internet.

Only a third of homes with children use blocking and filtering services to prevent access to adult internet content.

Female teens are more likely than male teens to post personal images and information about themselves and 22% of female teens have posted sexually suggestive, semi-nude or nude images.

The internet has led to at least 50,000 sexual predators being active online every day in children and teen chat rooms under false pretences.  More than 20000 new child pornography images are uploaded to the internet per week.

It is our responsibility to help our children to hold onto their youth for longer.  By teaching them to declutter and manage their distractions, and make better choices, we can improve their mental health.

10 Things You Must Teach Your Kids for Their Mental Health and Wellbeing

1. Healthy Choices

Don’t berate your child for what they eat or about their weight, however, do allow only healthy food options in your house with the occasional treat.  Food and drink should never be used as a weapon.  Your child needs to know what a healthy choice in food is and that some foods are only occasional treats.  Sugary, oily and salty foods (SOS foods) unfortunately appeal to a young child’s palate and are habit-forming.  Natural sugars found in fruit and sweeter vegetables are always better alternatives as a snack, especially when sliced and presented in a ready-to-eat way.  Oils in nuts (if your child is not allergic) are natural, as is the salt found in celery; organic peanut butter on a celery stick is a great little snack.

2. Clear creates Calm

By reducing the overwhelming number of items and gadgets that the average household owns, you open up your children’s lives to more space and less distraction.  Teach them to manage their duplicate items, donate their toys and gadgets they no longer use and manage their space by sorting, organising and tidying regularly (especially before changing activities).  It does not need to be a battle, but an expectation that you set up when they are young.  You are the adult in the household who needs to model and encourage this behaviour right from the start.  If you have been neglecting it, introduce it as a new expected behaviour that everyone in the house will follow.

3. Family comes First

You need to demonstrate the importance of family over any other distraction.  Don’t let sports, the news, gossip, your mobile phone and social media above your children.  More and more we are seeing parents in playground staring at their mobile phones when they should be interacting or watching their children.  A child’s life is fleeting, blink and you will miss out.  Choose your family first over any petty distraction.

4. Managing Emotions

Teach your children how to catch and manage their anger and anxiety before it explodes by taking a deep breath in for 5 seconds, holding it momentarily, and out for 5 seconds.  Ask them where they feel the most clenched or tense and encourage them to let go and relax the area.  They can actively squeeze this tense area and then release it.

5. Outdoors is Better than Indoors

Outdoor play gets your kids away from the TV, digital devices and passive play.  Being outdoors encourages all different kinds of movement, creative play, resilience and an outlet for their youthful energy.  Adventurers are always outdoors.

6. Rewards are in Words and Actions

Don’t reward them with toys or treats.  Neither is effective to reward them by saying they are “Amazing!” or “Great!” alone.  Tell them exactly what they did that was “Great!”; “It’s great to see you helping your little brother with their homework.  I really appreciate you for doing that.”  If they are your own children, give them a hug or a pat on the back.

7. Teach them Gratefulness and Appreciation

Don’t tell them to be grateful and appreciate all you have given them!  Stuff doesn’t count!  Sharing good relationships and enjoying the natural world does.  When you personally behave and respond positively to the small things in life, your children will learn to be thankful as well.  Family events and special occasions are all times to celebrate and show joy.

8. Teach Them to Buy Consciously and With Consideration

Children act from impulse buying often as a result of advertising, TV and their peers.  If you were to rush out and buy everything at your child’s whim, your house would be completely full of stuff.  Teach them to delay their gratification at least by a few days.  Children’s desires are as changeable as the wind.  They quickly are swayed by the next skilfully marketed toy.  Adults can be just as guilty of buying on impulse.  Let’s not encourage “Behaving like a kid in a candy shop” mentality.  We want them to learn how to delay gratification, not to torture them, but to build their resilience.

9. They have a Choice and a Voice Even When the World isn’t Fair

Children must know as they grow up, that they are allowed to express what they believe in and feel as long as they don’t intend to hurt others. They also must know that other people believe different things and might react to what they say. We can choose how we feel, but we can’t control how others feel and the events that happen in the world.

10. Teach Them How to Care for the Environment

Children need to know about where things come from, how they are grown or made and the consequences for the environment, not in a heavy-handed, guilt-inducing way.  Involve them in your recycling, encourage them to join an outdoor association such as the Guides, Cubs and Scouts.  Go camping and back into nature on your holidays, not to artificial resorts and Theme Parks.

There are some great stories out there teaching the message of conservation and environmental protection.  Check out these lists:

https://www.juniormagazine.co.uk/lifestyle/eco-conscious-childrens-books/

https://www.theschoolrun.com/best-environmental-books-for-children

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